Pitch // Raenef (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ademoelord) wrote2013-04-03 09:32 am
ademoelord) wrote2013-04-03 09:32 am
State of the Raenef (aka exestential crises)
((Cross posted from plurk because I need to not lose this.))
On a scale of 1 to 10 of how well Raenef's doing in Aather right now, he's hitting about a 3. He's having problems right now. A lot of them have to do with his other personality. It's acerbated by the game he "missed" when Jasper bussed itself. And then his two best friends left. And he has no idea what to do.
Okay, so the other personality is a big thing for him. He's not at all sure how to handle that situation. It would probably worry him less if he could actually remember what happens when the other side takes over, but he can't, and that freaks him out a little.
Back home, his memory losses due to the other half were contained to a single day, and brushed aside by Erutis, Chris, and Eclipse. He was told to not worry about it, and they didn't seem to so it was kind of an over and done situation. It never really came up again until the curse hit. Erutis and Chris also had a tendency to call the other half the "evil Raenef" and implied he was really kind of not good. They reinforced that the innocent Raenef was really important to them, and that helped a lot.
However, in Aather, Raenef doesn't know that his other personality coming out back home was a one time deal because he cannot remember what's happening in those memories. He doesn't know how often his losing consciousness happened. He doesn't know what the other half did that would cause his friends to call him evil.
He's scared because he doesn't know and he doesn't really have a way to find out what happened. Well, he could probably share the memories again, but I think Azure and Greed just said that the other half was different and didn't really go further into it last time he did. Mostly, it's the not knowing that is freaking him out so badly about the situation.
Then there's the game.
It's really obvious that Jasper had a huge bonding moment in that game... a bonding moment that he's completely cut off from because it was the other personality and he can't remember it. It feels like he's become almost a spare part, and the fact that everyone seemed to be operating in accord during that, and that everyone drew closer because of it further unsettles him because it was his other half that bonded with the team.
Ivory's explanation of the other half made it worse and confusing. He was amusing and entertaining. He's beginning to doubt whether the innocent half has a place. He doesn't want to disappear, but he's beginning to wonder if Jasper wouldn't be happier with the other half.
In canon, the innocent Raenef had years of life and experiences, good friends, and strong memories to help balance the two halves. In Aather, he's trying desperately to rebuild himself, but it's coming out of order and in small pieces, and he's losing that balance. His sense of self is faltering.
Worse, he's not sure how to explain it to people. He approached Beauty about it shortly after that game, but he was too shaken by everything for things to make sense even to himself, much less trying to explain it to her to see if he could get help. He talked to Lloyd about the other half as well, but he still doesn't have a way to deal with anything. The realm change is a huge distraction and he's enjoying the snow, but a distraction is all it is. It's hard to outrun his own thoughts.
...
And I have no idea how to help the situation.
...
Halp, I broke it T^T
On a scale of 1 to 10 of how well Raenef's doing in Aather right now, he's hitting about a 3. He's having problems right now. A lot of them have to do with his other personality. It's acerbated by the game he "missed" when Jasper bussed itself. And then his two best friends left. And he has no idea what to do.
Okay, so the other personality is a big thing for him. He's not at all sure how to handle that situation. It would probably worry him less if he could actually remember what happens when the other side takes over, but he can't, and that freaks him out a little.
Back home, his memory losses due to the other half were contained to a single day, and brushed aside by Erutis, Chris, and Eclipse. He was told to not worry about it, and they didn't seem to so it was kind of an over and done situation. It never really came up again until the curse hit. Erutis and Chris also had a tendency to call the other half the "evil Raenef" and implied he was really kind of not good. They reinforced that the innocent Raenef was really important to them, and that helped a lot.
However, in Aather, Raenef doesn't know that his other personality coming out back home was a one time deal because he cannot remember what's happening in those memories. He doesn't know how often his losing consciousness happened. He doesn't know what the other half did that would cause his friends to call him evil.
He's scared because he doesn't know and he doesn't really have a way to find out what happened. Well, he could probably share the memories again, but I think Azure and Greed just said that the other half was different and didn't really go further into it last time he did. Mostly, it's the not knowing that is freaking him out so badly about the situation.
Then there's the game.
It's really obvious that Jasper had a huge bonding moment in that game... a bonding moment that he's completely cut off from because it was the other personality and he can't remember it. It feels like he's become almost a spare part, and the fact that everyone seemed to be operating in accord during that, and that everyone drew closer because of it further unsettles him because it was his other half that bonded with the team.
Ivory's explanation of the other half made it worse and confusing. He was amusing and entertaining. He's beginning to doubt whether the innocent half has a place. He doesn't want to disappear, but he's beginning to wonder if Jasper wouldn't be happier with the other half.
In canon, the innocent Raenef had years of life and experiences, good friends, and strong memories to help balance the two halves. In Aather, he's trying desperately to rebuild himself, but it's coming out of order and in small pieces, and he's losing that balance. His sense of self is faltering.
Worse, he's not sure how to explain it to people. He approached Beauty about it shortly after that game, but he was too shaken by everything for things to make sense even to himself, much less trying to explain it to her to see if he could get help. He talked to Lloyd about the other half as well, but he still doesn't have a way to deal with anything. The realm change is a huge distraction and he's enjoying the snow, but a distraction is all it is. It's hard to outrun his own thoughts.
...
And I have no idea how to help the situation.
...
Halp, I broke it T^T
no subject
Star is the least helpful at these things, isn't she?
no subject
It's... weird, and I'm writing the skill up right now, so maybe that will explain it better. They are the same person -- Raenef. It's just they're not merged yet so it causes a lot of problems on his mental landscape, and may end up driving him insane before this is over.
no subject
no subject
...Though yeah, Star's stance is still that they're both you, and trying to completely deny either is a Bad Thing, so she'll probably be trying to find a way to get the two personalities to... work together in some way? She'll try to figure something out, at least.
no subject
either way echo would provide ~experienced~ advice and even point him to the right persona (i still need to pick up our thread not that i know if it would come up, but—!)